I write this as I speed-walk on a treadmill. I know. How technological of me. It really takes a lot of talent to not trip and fall flat on my face. I wonder how many people would laugh and how many people would rush over to my embarrassment. Maybe we’ll find out.
I hope to eventually fill this blog with every one of my experiences so that avid readers will feel they know me, can relate to me, like me. To stay on track, I’ll just say, I’ve been through some shit in my life. Deaths, break-ups, infidelity, depression, trust issues, self-harm. That’s not to say I haven’t had amazing moments. Births of nieces and nephews, adventures, happiness, uncontrollable pee-your-pants laughter.
Fitness has become my drug. A healthy drug. You know.. like.. Vitamin C or something. It has been the thing that has reminded me of my strength through those bad moments and also pushed me to believe that those happy moments can last. It reminds me, I haven’t had such a bad life overall. And even if it has been bad, I’m still alive, and more fortunate than many to have a roof over my head, money to afford a membership to a gym, and food on the table.
Which brings me to egg rolls. I started my new second job today. Besides being a counselor full time, I am now a receptionist at a gym. Two jobs means many things for me. Mainly, a second income so that one day down the road I can afford a tiny apartment just for me. But also, I started studying to become a personal trainer, and this job is my ‘foot in the door’ way of becoming closer to that goal.
I worked 13 hours today. Did a total of 1.5 hours of driving to get to each job. And realized on my drive to the gym at the end of the night, I hadn’t eaten since noon time. Yet I had two egg rolls in my car I had forgotten about. I devoured those egg rolls as I was driving and experienced a strange sense of happiness. (yes it was satisfying my hunger cravings) but also.. I looked back at the hours I worked and realized how many connections I made. How many stories I told, how many people joined the gym in just one day. How even after working so many hours, I was on the way to my gym to make myself better.
It’s funny how people tell me I got into this line of work because it makes me feel good to help others. It should make anyone feel good to help others! If it doesn’t, you’re doing it wrong. I joined this line of work, in ORDER to help others, because they deserve it. But what I realized today, is that I deserve it too.
Health and fitness make me the laughable, lovable, confident, independent woman that I am. And I am proud to be exhausted at the end of the day, speed-walking on a treadmill, type this story to you all.
Love until later,
P.S. I didn’t trip!